Yep, that’s right, only 24 hours left of what was, without any doubt, the most tumultuous year of my life!
As is custom, I take the last day of the year to reflect on all the events that shaped it, clear my head, meditate a little, try my best to tie up as many loose ends I can. I’ve let go of my gripes with people over stupid shit, made peace with some of the choices I’ve made, good or bad. Stuff the whole year into a little snow globe and shake it…
2005 will always hold a special significance to me. I guess mostly due to the whole cancer thing but not only that. I hooked up with a totally awesome girl, who still rocks my world pretty hard. I tried my hand at working for myself and that was a rush for a while, the likes I haven’t felt since back in the day when I was part of something special at “ex-work”. And even though the business didn’t work out as I had intended, I still learnt bucket loads from the experience.
One point though: NEVER TELL ME “WELL, AT LEAST YOU HAD THE GUTS TO DO IT / WELL AT LEAST YOU’VE LEARNT SOMETHING / WHATEVER NAMBY-PAMBY BS FILLER TO TRY AND MAKE ME FEEL BETTER about the Biz not taking off. I hate that shit. Even though I KNOW it, I still despise hearing it. If you really really wanna make me feel better, stick a cheque for 50 million Rand in my bank account. (did I mention that I’m going to take this opportunity to tie up lose ends? Consider this one tied… :) )
The cancer thing really didn’t affect me at all. Well, sure, physically it did, but not in a headfuck kinda way. In fact, where it not for the LiveStrong awareness bracelet I wear, I would have totally forgotten I even had cancer! It’s like I said once: I don’t think that this lesson was for me. I didn’t need this to happen so that I could appreciate life more. I didn’t need great tragedy or fear of death to wake me up to all the wondrous people around me and to start saying “I love you” more to mom and dad etc. I was already onboard, riding this shit for all it’s worth! Oh yeah, I believe there’s a purpose behind it (if you’ve enrolled in the school of “everything happens for a reason” and so forth…), but the lesson was not mine to learn. It was for / will be for - someone else. So I hope you retards paid attention, cus I ain't doing that again!! That was a one time performance ladies!
And just to add to the above: maybe I do still need to learn something from it and only time will tell. Isn’t the universe just fucking dandy!? J
On the relationship front, things couldn’t be rosier. I think that 2005 really restored my faith in the institution and that people of the opposite sex can, in fact, find enough common ground and harmony to make this shit work. Oh sure, we’ve had disagreements (who doesn’t?) but on the whole she’s a really fun and loving person to be around and I am truly happy. And for some weird fucking reason, she still feels the same about me! So I guess I have to keep her… :)
New to my reflection period is reading over my old blogs, all the way back to September 2004. Man, I can sure talk a lot! Do I always talk that much?! Sheesh…
Anyhoo, had a great chuckle at a couple of entries. This is EXACLTY why I wanted a blog! To be able to go back in time like that in a heartbeat, it’s awesome! My one regret is not keeping it as up to date as I could have, but hey.
I also tracked down my NY resolutions for 2005:
So 2005, I reckon:
- Become a business GOD
- Still try to get buffed and beefy
- Try harder for that threesome (I am not above begging)
- Get my golf game on
- Learn a new language (other than Drunkaneese)
Here’s wishing you all a very prosperous 2005, whatever you perceive that to be :)
Going down that list, I didn’t do too bad, I guess…
Become a Biz God? No, I wouldn’t say that, but half a point for effort.
Buffed and beefy? Always, sure, but maybe not in the context I was putting it. :)
Threesomes? <*stick wide ass grin here*> didn''t even have to beg!
Golf? Mmm, kinda, sure. I kick ass in Tiger Woods 06 for the Xbox so I get half a point for that.
Lol! Learn a new language! Hell no! :)
So that’s what, 2 out of 5? I reckon that’s fair, since most folks don’t even follow through on ONE of their resolutions.
Which brings me to 2006: *dim lights, drum roll please*
- Give the guitar another go, even if it is just to save face for 2005
- Forget buffed and beefy, develop my core definition so that I can fix this pain in the ass back of mine!
- Start that savings fund for House G-Force when I come back from London
- Get out there and travel the bejeezus outta Europe!
And that’s it. My list is a little shorter (and more realistic) than last year. I can’t wait till April to get my ass to the UK! It’s going to be fantastic, and if Jobserve.co.uk is anything to go by, quite profitable to boot. ;)
With that, I once again bid you all a very happy 2006! Lets have a spectacular party tonight and give 2005 the send off she so rightfully deserves!
[G], out
One more time
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